The
Emotional Roller Coaster
(Canadian Immigrant Magazine January
2012 Issue)
In my last article (December 2011), I spoke about the
30/60/90 day plan for new Canadians.
While that has its place and there is a regime that one
needs to set up, I would like to share something else that goes on in parallel.
The emotional Roller Coaster. And if you have been on a
real roller coaster, you will know what I mean.
In the first three months after arriving in Canada, the
number of emotions I never knew existed manifested themselves. Sure, I face new
emotional issues even today but have now learned how to live with them compared
to the early days.
We landed here on a high, a real high, excitement of
finally being in Canada, it was so surreal, we could not believe it. It had
taken us so long to get here; we had lost hope at times and finally we were
really physically here. What a feeling, we had arrived, we now belonged, this
was our new life.
Then the next emotion hit me.
So what, nobody cares, nothing against me personally
but life goes on, people have their lives to lead and so I found that unless I
made the move, I stayed in one place. The party was over, ground reality hit
me, I have to look for a job and I discovered new things. Lack of Canadian
experience, credentials are not recognized, savings diminish quickly and the
relative high cost of living. All hit me like a pile hammer bringing home a new
truth. Get up, get going or get left behind! No time to rest on my high,
feeling proud for making it to Canada but it was time to be noticed, time to
stand and to be recognized.
A different set of emotions takes over – anger,
depression, helplessness, anxiety all bundled in one. Why did I come here? What
am I going to do? Questions that hit me again and again. But I realized I was
not alone.
I could sit back and lament about it or I could get up
and do something about it, and chose the latter. I spent my early days going to
the gym staying fit and active, volunteering at some organizations so got to
meet new people, writing articles for the media for mental stimulation,
starting a blog and a self help group. All this helped take away my negative
emotions and I found my mood and my enthusiasm pick up as each day passed. My
circle of friends and my network increased and I soon moved from being a nobody
to being somebody.
Then a new realization begins, a sense of belonging, I
realized that I was not a guest in this country but one of its population. This
was now my home and I have to take charge of my life and move ahead.
That is the next emotion that came to me, the one of
belonging and one where I realized that the future is mine to make. I knew I
did not have the luxury of time unlike those born here so had to move faster.
There was a lot to learn and imbibe. Learning about doing things in the
Canadian way and that had begun to seep in.
Giving back, sharing my knowledge and operating from a
positive sense of mind with patience and perseverance.
Canada was my country now, the bed where I put lay my
head to rest at night, the nation where I must make my mark and that gave me
inner strength. So shall it be for you.
---------------------------xox-----------------------------
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